Monday, October 11, 2010

Dum Dum Dummmm.....

As the dramatic sounded effects indicated in the title, something or somethings BIG in my life are about to happen.  Well for starters, the TAPIF (Teaching Assistant Position in France) application is now open and I have filled out 65% of the application.  I still need my rec's, a physical exam and to write my statement of intent. Ohhhh and yeah I still need to figure out what are my top 3 "académies souhaitées" (the top 3 regions on France I would like to teach in).  I read on the teaching assistant blog that sometimes people are not placed in any of the 3 they chose and were placed somewhere COMPLETELY random, but I want to take my chance and try to chose 3 regions I would like to be placed in (blind faith).  If they place me in a region outside of France....no happy camper for me!

Secondly I am also applying for a neuroanatomy research position in, drumroll please.......BRAZIL! lol, yeah, can you tell I'm nuts yet? Yep, Brazil, soooo random but it sounds like a great opportunity for me and it combines me two loves, doing things related to science and medicine AND getting to leave the US.  To be completely honest with myself I am not really counting on this internship, I mean there are only 6 spots available and only God knows how many people are applying, plus I don't speak Portuguese. But I'm going to give it my all i the application and if it is God's will, then it will be done.

So certain gears in my life are being turned and its all exciting but for some reason, there is a small terror beginning to grow inside me.  It all started when I went to the TAPIF website and discovered that the application was open (which was sometime last week).  I gasped because I had been waiting for so long but then I stopped and starred an my laptop for a minute. Suddenly everything I was hoping to do became a reality. I thought to myself "Holy shit, am I actually about to apply to this thing, am I really gonna live in France for 7-9 months?" It was like ALL the excitement I had been building up vanished and fear rushed in to replace it.  I ended not opening the application until a couple days later in order to calm myself down. I probably won't be able to write my essay until I have a complete sound mind.  Maybe I'm just scared of what reactions will be like if I actually do this. I mean, my mama doesn't even know yet.  Maybe I just scared that she will reject the idea and the entire program if I decide to do it. Things have been tough in our family recently but all she wants me to do is to be focused, but it's not like me wanting to travel will delete all of my our aspirations, I would be gone for 1 year maybe 2 if I REALLY like the program and then its back to life as I know it.

So to build the momentum back up I have been trying my best to brush up on my French.  I watched a French film called "Mon Meilleur Ami" and "Unfaithful" (it's not a French film but Olivier Martinez is alll the French you need) and I have been sleeping to the soundtrack of "Amelie". Plus I borrowed some "French for Dummies" type of books help me practice until I can take classes at l'Alliance Francise again.

2 comments:

  1. Ha, you're so much better than me. I totally didn't practice ANY French at all. I did attempt to watch "Bring It On" in French (lasted 5 minutes) and I put some streaming French music on in the background. So you're already ahead of me!

    But anyway, I felt similarly when it was time to apply for the program this time last year. I had been wanting to do it for a long time, anticipating it for at least 3 months beforehand, and then when the application opened, I just put it off. Maybe I was too excited? Maybe I was just not able to deal with the fact that applying made it that much more real? I'm not sure. But it sounds like you're on your way. :)

    What kind of criteria are you using to narrow down your choices of academies? The reason I chose the ones I did (Nancy Metz, Strasbourg, and Nice) were because of their proximity to other countries and easy accessibility to travel, not to mention that they covered smaller portions of space, so I figured it would be more likely to be placed in a city or near a city.

    ReplyDelete
  2. How is the application process going for you?

    ReplyDelete